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best songs ever
any list like this is going to be painfully subjective—so my goal instead is simply to add songs when they become something notably greater to me, when it reaches some personally significant point to where each song will forever be tied to something more visceral than it is 'logical'. this can be and often is for a myriad of reasons; this list already is intensely broad in what emotions each song stirs, even if themes repeat more often than not. i've also included an added indicator 🪙 for when they paralyze me in awe on their first playthrough.
a few may have already waned themselves away from me, at least in the sense where their sounds can never hit upon what they used to, yet i've decided never to remove a song from this list. each placement is a sign of where i was and where i went, and what has shaped me. that's the real point of this list.
written 29 jul 2024

added '24 oct 29
Enjoy the Silence
Depeche Mode
added '24 oct 19
Empire Ants
Gorillaz
our little companion to our crumbling colony. the stage-setting, breaking from death-spiral workloads splits off slowly into an utterly mystical, spiritually magnetizing culmination for what that severance means for you, for us, for them. but that out-of-body revelation becomes its own fantastical machine. it courts you back as a cog, dreaming of a kinder reality to house those experiences within. obviously the empire will fall, someday... so you might as well keep the machine in your mind whirring instead of your little boat project; the colony will tide you over. you will not lose yourself in its waves. promise.
written '24 dec 20
added '24 jul 24
One
Metallica
the opposite of catatonic, overbearingly so. it is grimy and disgusting and horrifyingly vivid, and its overwhelming emotion is paralyzing. the instrumental machine-gun fire and searing vocals are so brittle, and it feels like the soul of it is wishing desperately to be excised forever. there is no other metal song that feels so painfully realized and caustically terrifying.
written '24 jul 28
added '24 jun 21
What's Going On
Marvin Gaye
added '24 jun 16
Immaterial
SOPHIE
added '24 jun 10
So I
Charli xcx
added '24 may 3
🪙 Real House
Adrianne Lenker
added '24 apr 29
Idioteque
Radiohead
added '24 apr 2
Hacker
Death Grips
added '24 mar 19
The Revolution Will Not Be Televised
Gil Scott-Heron
added '24 feb 14
movies for guys
Jane Remover
i've tried and failed, so, so much, through countless attempts, to capture any inkling of what these sounds mean to me. i can't even convincingly say that my statements on Frailty as a whole got all that close. maybe i'll find the words someday, some way to reform my mind from the mush it's become, from years upon years of poorly fitted intentions, and i can break away those fragments, those fears of what it would've meant had i known it all sooner, had i wrapped it together any more neatly. but it's so unbearably hard to separate it, to sanction off that blackened piece from the few fuzzy memories, and create out of it any meaningful step. any set of stairs that leads me to a better avenue to say that this is the most important piece of art in my life.
written '24 dec 20
added 2023 dec 11
Track 10
Charli xcx
added '23 dec 10
I Don't Like
Chief Keef & Lil Reese
added '23 nov 7
🪙 Heaven or Las Vegas
Cocteau Twins
added '23 oct 29
Free the Frail
JPEGMAFIA & Helena Deland
added '23 oct 20
Didn't Cha Know
Erykah Badu
added '23 oct 12
Billions
Caroline Polachek
added '23 oct 11
DoYaThing
Gorillaz, James Murphy & André 3000
added '23 sep 18
Ghost Town
Kanye West, 070 Shake, Kid Cudi & PARTYNEXTDOOR
added '23 sep 7
Yeah Right
Vince Staples, Kendrick Lamar, SOPHIE, Flume & Kučka
added '23 sep 5
Hydr6c0don$
Black Kray
added '23 aug 24
🪙 On GP
Death Grips
added '23 aug 13
Beware
Death Grips
added '23 jun 22
u
Kendrick Lamar
added '23 may 19
Silver Soul
Beach House
i still remember breaking down from this the first time. only Take Care from the album this is pulled from reaches near it, but the pushing and pulling, the eerily comforting tone backing up the best enchantment Victoria Legrand has ever delivered, it's all too much. i don't even think it's yearning, or that there's any one thing specifically it can (or wants to) harken to—it's just a spirit trapped in a current, and you grab hold of her so neither of you get lost forever.
written '24 dec 15
added '23 apr 27
I Love You
Lil B
added '23 apr 24
A Lot's Gonna Change
Weyes Blood
added '23 mar 22
90210
Travis Scott & Kacy Hill
added '23 jan 26
Once in a Lifetime
Talking Heads
added 2022 oct 27
Master of Puppets
Metallica
added '22 oct 27
Don't Cry
J Dilla
added '22 oct 26
Hazard Duty Pay!
JPEGMAFIA
added '22 sep 30
Life's a Bitch
Nas, AZ & Olu Dara
added '22 aug 5
Untitled (How Does It Feel)
D'Angelo
created by hand, by nat!

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