i'm still trying to figure out how to fill in the gaps after removing ratings, then moving over old comments, and trying to have more deliberate fun on platforms i've been syndicating to, especially letterboxd.
i liked the ability to essentially have (primarily for albums) lists of the dates when i saw/read/listened to everything for the first time; but i will say it became tedious even to me (what do i do about what i already had?), and serves no practical purpose to anyone walking through. what information is there really besides a number next to a ton of things, without reason?
i don't like the added blurriness of not having those tables, but it has overlapped nicely with feeling less tethered, able to just spit thoughts out when they actually mean something instead of simply thinking of the most fitting rating and moving on. besides, i can still have fun doing that on rym, aoty, and letterboxd. it's hard to draw the line between what i post on them and on here, which is the main reason for these three paragraphs.
but the main purpose of everything here from now on is just as recap for november, and looking forward to a few things that i want to develop further. i want to come up with a nice system to be able to show favorites, best lists for release years, some charts (instead of tables) for genre dives and those best lists, and different, more creative ways to yell about things i loved, hated, or were passionately indifferent towards. that last point is what these new comments are here for at the very least, and we'll see how long it takes to develop into something meaningful.
even though my reading list has stayed stagnant, i've been reading no longer human by osamu dazai recently the most. i'm always wary of any piece of media that tries to positively take this angle of male loneliness, of ostracization because 'ugh, no one understands me, i'm different than everyone else, are humans really empathetic, are women even people', because it's so poisonous, and it rubs off in some of the worst ways imaginable often times. but i guess there is something there so far, enough that i keep going. whether it's the fact that there was immense trauma that befell both the character and the author—though i will say, most people that experience trauma don't become horrible people, so that's no excuse (though, it is a story...)—or whether it's something deeper, that there is some more important message or purpose that i desperately hope it taps into more, i'm not sure of yet. the writing style isn't flashy, but it's offbeat and flawed, uncomfortably, endearingly so.
and i hope i read as much as i have going forward as i have in the past week or so; i'm about halfway through both that and stung with love by sappho, i was eating away at crime & punishment for a minute before my library rental of no longer human came in, and the utopia of rules by david graeber has a permanent seat as 'fun' sociological reading until i get through it all. school for the next upcoming year or so will dampen it a lot, i'm sure, but dealing with planning for that end and transitory period to follow is a lot (...maybe just a good amount) of motivation.
i reviewed celeste a few days ago now, and i'm happy about that, i think it turned out well, and i said about as much as what came through to me through playing it—at least, that i can contain within what it did and said, barring a lot of the personal it stirred for the sake of not repeating myself.
i don't have much more to say unfortunately. i mean, i started playing rainbow six: siege with friends, and that's been really fun despite the insane skill ceiling that i can see in it, and minecraft has been slowing down in playtime because of everything i've already said here. but devoting time to a medium i have little experience and little current motivation for is tough, and it'll probably be a while before i get to anything new. either way though, i've had nier:automata, omori, pools, the unfinished swan, what remains of edith finch, and yume nikki (which i've started a bit) on my active list in steam for a little while now. i hope they sweep me up enough to really devote time to soon.
i'm glad i've slightly gotten over the hump with sitting down and watching movies more deliberately often than i used to, in watching five new for the first time this month, rewatching four after a very long time, and putting a word in for (against?) one in each of those camps.
i said all i really feel both 2001: a space odyssey and wicked deserve from me, so i won't belabor it and move onto something happier. spirited away is now the only movie i've given a perfect score, which feels right; compared to what i've seen that's just lower than it in my mind, it feels like it simultaneously taps into a whole lot without feeling like it's trying to as hard as those are, or it simply stumbled into being immaculately cogent. it's one of those instinctive, self-apparently awe-inspiring, gorgeous movies. i'll save the rest for when i think about it better.
coraline and ponyo stick out the most besides that overdue rewatch; i had seen the former years ago, and it was even better coming back to when i'm able to pick apart what it all means, and the latter has been in the back of my mind for a while to finally get to. coraline isn't even far and away the better of the two; despite the lack of perceived service for non-children in ponyo, it achieves eye-watering beauty in a way that too feels self-apparent and worthwhile.
the rocky horror picture show, the crow, and clueless were the other three first watches, and the matrix was the fourth re-watching; i think they all kind of speak for themselves in their own ways. i definitely loved coming back to the matrix the most, and the crow was certainly the least compelling in what it tries to say, but the other two were, in uniquely extravagant ways, incredibly fun (confoundingly so in just the right way for the first).
and while you can just see my letterboxd watchlist, i'm especially interested in seeing soon promising young woman (in part because it's lily alexandre's only half-star review, and it's relatively highly rated overall on letterboxd), anora, dune, come and see, mulholland drive, and i really need to rewatch princess mononoke.
here's the longest section :D
it always will be, since albums are definitely the primary reason for this existing, and the medium through which i think i can speak (type) in the most useful ways—but i'll try my best never to drag it out, especially since i'm now planning on just linking what i've listened to each month on albumoftheyear instead of rambling about them all.
i did re-listen to, after a few years, both blue lines by massive attack and long season by fishmans, and the differences between my thoughts on them from then to now are odd. the former was initially a huge disappointment after prior listening to mezzanine, while now it feels more like the spark of a few good songwriting and production ideas that would explode out into much more later on; and the latter used to be one of the most interesting, moody, and expansive short albums i had ever heard, while now it just feels like a set of short, nice-sounding but lacking mood boards of rehashed sounds. i was definitely caught in some wave of internet hype for long season that first time, and i didn't have nearly the same backlog of listening as i do now—and i'd like to be proven wrong about its sound palette being more creatively forward-thinking than it now feels to me—but it's still a kind of loss, that something can wilt so much to my ears.
but for the sake of time, here are some compacted thoughts on a few of those first listens i had this past month, at least that i haven't review already:
i'm also really excited for both eusexua by fka twigs and perverts by ethel cain next year though, and i'm also patiently waiting (as best i can) for whatever jane remover has up her sleeves next. also jeans by 2hollis is fantastic :>
i rewatched chernobyl for the expertly choreographed disaster cinema, and it was everything i remembered it to be. on the complete other hand, i watched the first episode of black mirror and i can't imagine ever having thinking there was something to it. i'm scared to watch fifteen million merits or san junipero or especially hated in the nation at this point, because looking back their synopses give exactly the wrong kind of impression, particularly with the 'ooh bad screen' mess that i've come to associate with the whole show now. maybe i should leave them be just to keep their original memories, instead of watching them with new eyes.
i'm also now halfway through nana (which is amazing but in a simple way), halfway through atlanta season 4 (which is just very good so far, s/o d'angelo), and i've had blue planet as nice background material after giving up on house at season 7 (sorry owen) and adventure time at season 3 for the time being.
for some reason it's become hard for me to finish a season of a show compared to back in september and october, but at least what i have watched is a nice range and well produced—and veneno, dororo, and arcane are on my immediately following list.
that was all a lot in hindsight, and i hope that this and other comments morph into more than just fun half-reviews, but it's still fun at least; non-postcards are definitely for the little things i have that aren't directed at any one piece of media, so we'll see how that goes :)
ilysm <3
written 1 dec 2024
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